Whispers In The Dark
by Everlasting Faerie Light
Summary: Despite the lies that you're making; your love is mine for the taking. My love is just waiting to turn your tears to roses. -Angsty Spamano songfic. The song "Whispers In The Dark" belongs to Skillet. Mild yaoi/shounen-ai.


It is cold. So cold.

I can't feel anything but the biting, whirling ice that eats away at my open wounds as it pounds mercilessly on me, the wind whistling in my ears, taunting me, telling me that I have failed.

I have been reduced to nothing. Absolutely nothing. I am crawling on my hands and knees, the icy snow rubbing against my already pale flesh.

Crawling like a lowlife. A piece of filth.

I've lost it all. Everything.

Everyone I had the slightest care about has been stripped away. All of my hope has been broken. My desire to live has been shattered.

Almost.

Not completely.

I'm still crawling. I'm still crawling, constantly in broken motion, gritting my teeth as the never ending plethora of ice crystals shoots from the sky.

I need to find him.

Because, something tells me that he's still here.

…

_Despite the lies that you're making_

_Your love is mine for the taking_

_My love is just waiting_

_To turn your tears to roses._

…

I can hardly see; my vision is failing. I know that if I keep this up, my body will fail. I will physically cease to exist. But I have to keep going. I just know it. He's here somewhere. And I can't just let him die like this, in this never ending frozen tundra of hell.

The sky is completely black. The tall trees stretch their branches menacingly at me, and do little to prevent the constant stream of rain and snow. My head droops in exhaustion, and through my blurred vision, I see scarlet. Everywhere.

It pools and stains the ice. It stands out, vibrant, dark, and gruesome against the ivory of the snow. Through my shifting vision, I follow the trail of blood. All the way to the source.

And there he is, lying gently upon the forest floor, surrounded by pool of dark blood. I can see from here that his face is deathly pale, and that his eyes are shut.

My chest constricts violently. I force my protesting body to move faster. But it's just so hard. It hurts so much. I can feel my own blood dripping down my neck and my arms. It won't be long now. It won't be long until my body shuts down.

But I don't care. I don't give a fucking shit as long as I can reach the man, lying there motionless, mere feet away from me.

Once I reach him, I lose it. I feel the tears cascade from my eyes, and freeze before they can drip down my chin. I look into his face. My whole body shakes as I hopelessly throw my body over his, attempting to protect it from the merciless snowfall.

"Y-You f-fucking bastard…" I choke out miserably. I rest my head on his chest, sobbing. I wish that I could just die here. I wish that it would just be over…

A heartbeat.

A dangerously slow, faint, yet steady heartbeat.

I freeze. I hold in my next stream of sobs. I lift my head from his chest and stare down into his face. There are two deep gashes slicing down his cheek. His dark hair is flecked with ice, snow, and blood. But I see it. His eyes flutter slightly. I feel the gentle rise and fall of his chest beneath my hands.

"A-Antonio?" I choke out.

…

_Despite the lies that you're making_

_Your love is mine for the taking_

_My love is just waiting _

_To turn your tears to roses_

…

I see his facial expression change. He frowns slightly, the crease between his eyebrows deepens. I hold my breath, despite my aching chest.

Please…Please….wake up. Please, respond. I can't lose you. I can't lose you, Tonio…

Then, his eyes slowly flutter open. I look, aghast. The whites of hi eyes are completely red. Blood red. The usual vibrant green is dulled, covered in a coating of dark lifelessness. I know it. I know that he can't see.

These are the eyes of a broken man.

A man more broken than I am.

And I didn't think that was possible.

I hold him close.

…

_I will be the one that's gonna hold you_

_I will be the one that you run too_

_My love is a burning_

_Consuming fire_

…

"L-Lovi…" he chokes out, his voice breaking with pure pain and despair.

It stings. It hurts. It hurts so much to see him like this. To see him so broken. I tighten my hold on him, wishing…just wishing that somehow the ice would dissapear, that the bleeding would stop, that the pain would cease, that time can be reversed.

Because everything is gone, now. Everything except for me and him.

I lay my head down gently on his chest and embrace him. "I-I'm h-here…"

I'm here.

His breathing is ragged. It comes out in uneven intervals. But I still feel his hand gently touch my back. It rests there, limp, subtle…yet present. It sends a warm shock through my ice cold body. It makes me forget that the ice and rain won't stop falling…

And I hear him talk.

"I-It's all g-gone…"

His voice is completely shattered, full of devastation and realization. It's soft and lifeless. I can hear the painful sob that accompanies his statement. And it makes me die a little more inside.

Because it's true.

It is gone.

Everyone we ever gave a damn about is gone.

Feliciano, Bella, Francis, Gilbert, Ludwig…they're all gone.

Finished.

…

_No  
You'll never be alone  
When darkness comes I'll light the night with stars  
Hear my whispers in the dark_

…

"Lovi…"

I lift my head from his chest and shift my body up so that I am looking directly into his pain-stricken face. He is trembling, the blood pouring down his cheek continuously. I know that he wants to sob. But he can't. He just can't.

It would hurt too much.

I look at him, my vision fading in and out. Yet, he is the only thing I can clearly see.

"P-Please…" he says.

I watch as his face crumples up even more.

"P-Please…I-I don't w-want to die here…"

I close my eyes and gently place my hands on his cheeks, cringing at how cold they are. I listen as he continues to plead and cry, his breathing uneven and forced.

"A-Anyhere but here…p-please…I-I…"

And I let him go on. I listen to him, and gently wipe the pouring blood from his cheeks. And I realize now, that it is up to me.

I will make sure that he survives this.

Even if I have to beg and scream for help, even if I have to kill myself, even if I have to burn in hell…

I will be the one that will help him heal.

…

_No  
You'll never be alone  
When darkness comes you know I'm never far  
Hear my whispers in the dark  
Whispers in the dark_

…

I remember back when I was a child. Antonio was a constant presence in my life. He was always my teacher, my healer, my parent, my older brother…everything. He put up with my insults, my anger, my often unforgivable words. He was quick to forgive, with that smile on his face.

Even when he was injured he smiled. I remember the wars he fought for me. I remember seeing him bloody, beaten, in pain, the wounds angry as they sliced through his skin. I remember crying when I saw them. But he never broke. He just continued to smile, telling me that he was going to be fine.

He guided me. He taught me everything I know. He always looked after me.

Maybe…maybe it's time that the roles are reversed.

I promise. I promise that I will be the one to guide him. I will be the one to hold him, to wipe his tears away, to let him heal.

He will survive this. He will smile again.

…

_You feel so lonely and ragged_

_You lay there broken and naked_

_My love is just waiting_

_To cover you in crimson roses_

…

"A-Antonio…you're n-not going to d-die," I say. My voice shakes, but I keep my words clear, firm. I keep my hands on his cheeks, wishing, willing, praying that some warmth returns to him. I need to comfort him. I can't fail. I won't fail.

No. I, Lovino Vargas, am not going to fail this time. I will not let the ones I love slip away again.

The wind picks up, whistles, laughs, taunts. It tells me that I am spilling utter bullshit. After all, I am South Italy. What have I ever done in my life to prove myself? I always sulked in the shadow of my younger brother. I let myself be overridden by greater powers without putting up a fight. I was mean, selfish, cruel, highly sensitive, lazy, spoiled. I could never win.

So when everything came crashing down, when everything was stripped away from me in a blink of an eye, I blanched.

What have I done to show that I can help Antonio?

What have I done to even deserve another chance?

What have I done to even deserve his trust?

I grit my teeth, feeling more tears spill from my eyes. I start to sob again. I feel them wrack my body, draining away the remainder of the energy in my body.

"_M-Mi dispiace_, Antonio. I-I'm so sorry…" I whimper, my voice barely above a whisper.

What am I sorry for? Am I sorry for all the times I've taken him for granted? For rejecting him? For insulting him? For discriminating against him? For not being there for him? For not getting here soon enough?

"L-Lovi…"

Though wracked in pain, the Spanish man's voice is filled with sentimentality as he reaches up a trembling hand to caress my cheek.

I cover his hand with my own.

"Y-You…you m-mean so much to me, _m-mi tomate_…"

…

_I will be the one that's gonna find you_

_I will be the one that's gonna guide you_

_My love is a burning, consuming fire_

…

So I pray.

I pray desperately to my Lord.

Please don't fail me…

I repeat every prayer that I know in my head. I mouth them wordlessly, feeling the vibrant richness of the words as they roll of my tongue. Warm. Hopeful. Exuberant.

I ask Him to let me be the rock this time. I pray that I can be the one that Antonio will lean on, that I will be the one that he'll run to.

I pray for the strength to carry him home.

To get him away from this place.

Please. I just want one more chance.

_Per favore…_

…

_No_

_You'll never be alone_

_When darkness comes_

_I'll light the night with stars_

_Hear my whispers in the dark_

…

I reopen my eyes.

I don't care if I'm bleeding. That I'm on the brink of death. That the odds are against me.

I am filled with a new vibrant determination. I will not let it falter this time.

"Antonio…" I whisper, bringing my face close to his.

He looks back at me with those unseeing red eyes. The eyes of a corpse. A corpse who hasn't quite breathed his last yet.

I gently cup his cheeks again, and bring my face down so that my lips are only care centimeters away from his. And then my heart starts to pound against my chest. For once in a long time, I feel alive. I feel vibrant. I feel awake.

Warm.

The electricity circulates in the air.

Then, I bring my lips down on his.

I feel his body react immediately. Even if he is in pain, I feel his limbs twitch, and I can feel his faint heart speed up, intertwining with mine. Even if his lips are cut and frozen, they're still warm to me, soft, perfect…absolutely perfect.

The whirling snow has no effect on us. Because we're invincible.

Finally, I break the kiss, and look into his face. I see the tears spilling from his eyes…I see the ghost of a smile on his lips.

"_Ti amo, _you bastard," I say with a painful smile. My heart feels like its swelling. I feel like for the first time…I'm on fire.

A burning, consuming fire.

…

_No_

_You'll never be alone_

_When darkness comes _

_You know I'm never far_

_Hear my whispers in the dark_

…

I bring my lips to his ear and start to whisper. I whisper over and over again. I talk of old memories, of the ones we love, of trivial things, of how we will make it through this, of how much I love him.

Just follow my voice, Antonio.

I will make sure that you heal.

And then, he wraps both of his arms around me, and whispers back.

"_Te amo_, Lovi."

And for an instant… the clouds roll away. The violent ice storm ceases to a soft snowfall. Soundless, gentle, silent.

Absolutely silent except for the constant whispers.

Whispers in the dark.


End file.
